Premier League Coaches: American Equivalents

Arsene Wenger: Bill Belichick

Both men have a notorious knack for spotting young talent.  Arsene Wenger’s frugality in the transfer market with youthful players proves this, as he specializes in getting the most out of his players, and in some cases selling them for enormous profits (Anelka, Veiera, Henry, Fabregas, Van Persie, etc.).  Belichick, known for stockpiling draft picks in the later rounds, has a similar eye for productivity where others may not see it.  Like Wenger, the Patriots boss has a unique relationship with the media, keeping the club dealings very private and sarcastically toying with the emotions of story-hungry journalists.  They even have similar fashion tastes: Belichick prefers a sweatshirt with the sleeves cut off, while Arsene is well-known for his ongoing battle with the occasional malfunctioning zippered-jacket.

Alan Pardew: John Tortorella 

This would fall under the category as a ‘fiery’ manager, but that’s probably an understatement.  Pardew is one of the most oft and heavily fined managers in all of sports, as is Tortorella, who currently coaches the Vancouver Canucks.  Pardew has had several feuds with Arsene Wenger, even prompting the studious Frenchman to have a shove at him following an Arsenal loss to West Ham.  Only a few months ago, Tortorella was banned 15 games by the NHL for supposedly marching into the Calgary Flames locker room and physically confronting opposing coach Bob Hartley.  Torts had to be restrained by several coaches and players; given these two mercurial personalities, Manchester City’s owners should cut off a chunk of their transfer budget to see these guys duke it out at Cowboys stadium in front of 120,000 people.  Sadly, however, Tortorella was fired by Vancouver after just one season.  Apparently his Happy Gilmore at the Waterbury Open-like antics didn't sit too well with management...

Sam Allardyce: Bruce Bochy

Bay Area sports fans who follow the premier league should see my reasoning in this.  Not only do each of these men have a head and body size that would drive the equipment manager to madness (in the event that West Ham ever had to provide a hat to their manager...), but they both enjoyed long careers in the leagues they currently coach in.  Big Sam made over 400 appearances in the premier league, and was born to be a leader.  Bochy played a decade in the major league and now has two World Championships to his name since joining the San Francisco Giants in 2007.  I wouldn’t expect Allardyce to replicate his American clone’s success in the premiership however.  

Jose Mourinho: Phil Jackson

The parallels between these two are unbelievable.  Not only do they have similar levels of success in different regions of their continent, but they share similar coaching philosophies and even take note of each other.  In 2011, Jackson credited Mourinho with instilling a similar flow and organization to the way his team plays, and goes as far as to compare his triangle offense to play on the football pitch.  Mourinho has stated that Phil Jackson, among others, is possibly his biggest influence on the managerial position; who better to model your style off of then the zen master himself?  The biggest similarity between these two however, is that nearly every one of their players universally loves them.  Here’s a good source for further reading... http://blog.lakers.com/lakers/2011/03/16/the-art-of-coaching/ 

Honorable Mention- David Moyes: Art Shell

These two don’t quite make the list, since both of them are out of a head-coaching job at the moment, and for good reason.  In an abysmal first season with United, David Moyes looked like he had aged a decade after less than a year in charge, while Art Shell roamed the sidelines of Oakland with the same blank stare (http://www.sfgate.com/blogs/images/sfgate/chroncast/2006/08/23/ArtShell250x276.JPG) premier league fans are so familiar with seeing on the face of Moyes.  The facial expression is what made me draw this comparison, for both men were too often spotted with a look that said ‘I haven’t a clue what is going on in this game.’  Shell, typical of Raiders coaches over the past decade (sorry folks, Denver fan here), was fired after just one season in 2006, a season that saw Oakland’s worst record since 1963 (2-14).  Similarly, Moyes didn’t even make it through his first season, and set several records at United; 1st home loss to West Brom since 1978, 1st home loss to Newcastle since 1972, 1st league loss to Stoke since 1984, and you get the point.  

Honorable Mention- Miguel Herrera: No One

No one is like Miguel Herrera; as I've mentioned before, he was the highlight of the World Cup for me, and Mexican fans should have reason to smile going forward.  Never in my life have I seen one man exert so much energy and joy without setting foot on the field, and probably channelled more happiness in one goal celebration than the English fans have in the last two World Cups put together.  Herrera in his playing days had no regard for rules at times, and was essentially a bull in a china shop in his quest for victory.  I hope Herrera is still around by Russia in 2018, or maybe a premier league club will pick him up and immediately gain a fan in myself.